The Three Stages of Life

by Judy (7-C-1 FPE)

I suppose the actual seed of TVism lies far back in the mists of a time long past forgetting. Whether it can be laid to the arrangement of the genes in the em- bryonic cells of the womb, or some fleeting incident brushing the soul of childhood, or simply to the mature revelation of the delights and benefits of allowing the nascent femininity to bloom I will have to leave to those mariners more familiar with the uncharted oceans of the mind than I. I know, and thus can speak, only of my own rememberances; and the reasons I believe these events caused me to turn down the road that I did.

I do know that in my early childhood I evidenced a strongly feminine nature. As far back as I can rem- ember I have preferred the soft and the pretty to the harsh drabness of the male world. I had no interest in such things as climbing trees and fences, or playing baseball, or fishing in the creek that all of the "reg'lar fellers" seemed to relish so. I would much rather sit and dream, or design and make things, or just go off by myself and examine my own tiny world. With the insight of the young I was soon dubbed a "sissy"; and (I can now admit it) knowing it was all too true, re- sented it violently. Even then I preferred girls--pre- ferred being with them, and being like them. But the resentment at the epithet forced me into a false image, and so I worked at the hated task of being "all-boy". As the years passed, like an actor in a long-running play, I became quite proficient in my role; even to the extent of stifling most of my feminine desires. I retained my preferences for the nicer and prettier things of life, but I would not allow myself indulgence in them. And so the volcano lay dormant until I was fif- teen, when the eruption was triggered by--what else?-- a girl.

ion".

It was about at the pinnacle of the "great depress- My mother and I had a small furnished apartment

23.